You’ll hear it time and time again especially as you get older and sadly, (in my experience) if you’re super sociable. The ‘toxic ones’ are those that will drag you down, pull you into negativity and make you a big part of it. They’ll complain, over-share and usually not even realise they’re doing it. It’s all about vibes you see and vibes needs to serve some purpose, even if that purpose just involves sitting there and swirling about.
When I say I’m speaking from experience, I really am. Having been there, done that and gotten the tee-shirt, I feel well equipped to talk on the subject.
Feeling unsure as to how to manage whirlwinds of toxicity? Read on my friends.
*It’s all about the energy.
Energy is power people. You ever hear people say that you can feel someone’s energy in a room before they’ve even spoken? Toxic energy is unavoidable at times especially if you’re the kind of person who likes to leave your house every once in a while. Instead of denying it’s happening, be aware and find ways to manage it. Shake things up with a good dance, leave the room or simply learn to deal with it.
*Manage those responses.
The toxic comments, conversations and situations are always going to arise. Then the follow up and the drama from those very circumstances have the risk of continuing thereafter. Knowing who you are and managing your own reactions to such encounters will ensure you maintain your sanity and keep out of the toxic webs.
*Pull them into your peace.
Don’t allow toxic people to pull you into their storm – instead, pull them into your peace. Instead of getting frustrated with how people are behaving, how about we try and understand them and cheer them up? Come up with a positive story, a fun activity or ask them some supportive questions that can help them figure it out or at least feel more centred.
*Check yourself before you wreck yourself.
Yes I’ll admit it. In the past, I have considered myself somewhat toxic. I have a super obsessive personality when it comes to certain topics and I NEED to talk about something at length in order to feel better about it. Keeping in mind what frustrates me about toxicity ensures I keep it at bay. Be mindful and keep that self-awareness on point.
*Avoid those stimulants.
You know the way I’m always instagramming and blogging about my decaf coffee? Coffee creates more adrenaline and so, can affect reactions and stress. I try to stay composed (most of the time) and so, avoiding coffee ensures this happens . Know what suits you and remember, composure is key when managing any stressful meetings.
*Know the difference.
These are times when we all need a chat, a shoulder or just a big old moan. Whoever they are, they need your support. Often, rather than actually being toxic, people can be going through a hard time and simply need a shoulder. Strike the balance between listening, helping and changing the subject. Remember, always reverting back to self-awareness – intuition is king.
*Don’t make the same mistakes.
There are certain conversations where you just know the way it’s going to go. It won’t be all sunshine and rainbows and probably, some venting is going to happen. That’s fine. Vent away. Consider this though – will it make you or them feel better?
Constantly being aware of our encounters, the energy we’re bringing to the table and how we’re interacting with the energy around us is key to a peaceful day to day life. Like a business, a classroom or even a blog, it needs to be managed delicately and with gentle care.