All The Advice You Thought You Needed

In December, I tried Reiki for the first time. Heading off to Cork, I sat outside, inside, by lots of trees and lay out in the wild to experience energy healing and all it had to offer. I learned more about the power of animals, nature and ‘the basics’ when it comes to feeling my best. Often, I’ve felt that fancy and elaborate needs were the way forward in terms of self-assurance and being my best self. Actually, what made so much sense was to get back to the grounding benefits of being in nature, meditating, being around animals and connecting with like-minded and emotionally healthy people. Reflecting back to that particular time, it was like having all of those reminders together in one go and set the tone for the coming months where I would continue to explore my intuition and listening to my body as much as possible.

As I carried on throughout the week, I recognised that these were the specific needs I had and that I wanted to feel that zen as much as possible. I followed up with some time working with a life coach, changed my diet and built a stronger habit of listening to myself and my body in order to feel my best and to guide this path with more ease.

‘Why would you fight, June?’ was the question of a friend lately. She highlighted this to me as I experienced a moment of un-ease due to some decisions I had been making. There are always choices – in any situation and listening to our emotions is imperative to knowing what serves us.

I read a post by Mel Robbins lately about doing a survey with friends before making a big decision. It can be a tendency (I know it is for me), to reach out and talk through any situation to get advice with a lot of friends. We tell the same story over and over again in the hopes that we’ll reach an answer either by having them tell us or having an aha moment while discussing it which will magically bring us to the answer.

Having the solution told to us would be pretty handy, huh?

Talking through is great and I certainly advocate for this. As I guide through the decisions in my life, goodness knows I’ve learned that ruminating for too long and not sharing with those we trust most can be detrimental to our health. It can also leave us with too many thoughts and then, overwhelm. Thankfully, we can still do both – talk through things and get advice where we’d like in a situation.

Here are some ways that work for me when it comes to managing through a situation.

Set expectations as you enter into a conversation. What do you want to get from it and why are you diving into it with this person? If you want to talk through and not get advice, say this. As humans, we tend to jump into solutions in a situation due to how our brains operate.

Manage your emotions before getting into the conversations. Have an idea and strong pulse on how you’re feeling and be sure to allow this in as you start to chat. At times, naming an emotion can help guide the objective of the conversation you’re having or planning on having.

-Being compassionate to the other person. When it comes to giving advice, it comes from a place of our own experience. Seems pretty obvious to say this but there are paradigms, life choices and focuses at play. As we listen or share (as the advice giver), it’s important to note that that there’s a lense that everyone is wearing that influences what they share.

-It’s about the process too, remember this. Perhaps you don’t have an answer yet as you’re not meant to? You can enjoy the journey and find your way to the answer when the time is right. It will work out in the end – promise.

Happy Sunday & keep shining x